Ever since the liberal mainstream media called the election for Joe Biden even before all the votes were counted and with allegations of pro-Democratic voter fraud all across this great land of ours, the so-called “free press” has been proclaiming that Donald Trump can’t win the election, that he’s a “loser,” and that Joe Biden is going to be the next president. But these elites have forgotten about a little-known loophole – one that I know the Trump campaign and its lawyers are considering – and if Trump uses it, he’ll be the winner of the election.
It’s called a “coup.” Ever heard of it, libtards?
See, ever since the election, Trump has been dumping military leaders who are probably members of the pedophile cabal he’s going to round up any minute now. He also stacked the Supreme Court and his supporters – cops and non-cops alike- are vowing to support him in an armed assault against anyone who dares defy his glorious will.
All Trump has to do is get the military to agree to arrest anyone who defies him. Although that might be hard, because the military is full of communist infiltrators, so instead he’ll rely on his secret police force headed by an “illegally” appointed chief (leftist judges call him illegal but if the president does something it isn’t illegal). Then, the Supreme Court rules that, because Trump is very handsome, he’s entitled to a second term. Done!
Now, some people have suggested there might be another way. Trump has repeatedly pointed out that the ballot count isn’t final and the media isn’t supported to call an election before the count is final, although they did do that in 2016 and he didn’t mind then. Project Veritas says it has proof that postal workers in Erie, Pennsylvania, changed the postmarks on ballots so they would be counted; the person who said that recanted his allegation, which was the only proof, but now he’s recanted his recanting and says his allegation is genuine, and if we believe this latest version then the allegation is real and as long as they did it to 50,000 ballots then there’s still a chance Pennsylvania would flip back to Trump. And there’s always faithless electors: maybe some of the lifelong Democrats who are elected to cast electoral votes for Joe Biden will actually be secret Trump supporters or will realize, in their final moments before voting, that Trump is truly the greatest American president we have ever had. That’s never happened before in American history and it would counteract the whole idea that the Democratic Party is a wholly-corrupt entity where no adherents have any independent thought.
No, no, it seems like the only way to save American democracy and liberty and all the things we stand for is for Donald Trump to push an armed coup against the will of the voters. Because he is the greatest American president.
Political scientist and layabout, editor at Pyramid, maybe an author someday? Of like a real book? No need to rush it, though.